Pre-Deployment

Wow, I seriously can't believe how fast this year has gone by! It seriously feels like Rey and I just got married the other day and it really did feel as if we had forever until he deployed! Now, here we are only a few weeks away from deployment number two! I have read about going through different stages when one goes through the whole process of a deployment and right now I think I am in denial. Honestly it feels like Rey and I are just going to be together for forever and he isn't going to leave. Although, I am now starting to believe that maybe this is because at this point in time I really can't imagine my life without having him around for seven whole months! I really just don't know why, but we are less than two weeks from a deployment and it still doesn't feel like he is going to leave. Then again, as the deployment kept getting closer and closer I told myself not to concentrate on it and just take in every single moment together so I wouldn't regret anything when he was gone. All week we have planned to pack up our apartment and put things in storage but each and every day we put it off. A big part of me thinks it is because deep down we just don't want to move out of our first apartment together, but obviously it needs to get done so I really do wish I could just make myself realize how soon he is leaving and just do it, but I guess it is kind of nice living in this little fantasy world where we can just concentrate on being together and not taking any moment for granted. I'm pretty sure the next stage is where you pull away from each other because you know what is about to happen and you do it to protect yourself, but I really just don't want that to happen! Basically what I want is for this deployment not to happen.. but since that isn't going to happen I really don't know what I want. Well, that is my feelings for the time being.. I guess we shall see how things go in the next two to three weeks!